It Is Important To Release Your Oppressed Mind & Feelings

After the affair of the spouse is revealed, the cheated gets troubled because of hard feelings and oppressed mind. This is very typical at the initial stage of the counseling. It is not easy to speak openly about the troubles and oppression and most of the times, it is kept by oneself. Sometimes the cheated feels ashamed and feel conscious of the other people around; relatives, neighbors and friends. The affair problem is kept within oneself.

The causes of oppression and trouble are from
- Extramarital affair of the spouse
- The hardships and the endurance experienced during the marriage
- Sex related problems and troubles
- Selflessness and helplessness
- Psychological rage
- and others

The typically those listed below are more prone to these feelings

- Repeated affair and cheating of the spouse
- Repeated abuse, violence and conflict
- Individual happiness is put aside in the place of the happiness and calmness of the family and the spouse.
- Individuals who thinks that endurance is the best policy in solving problems and troubles.
- Frequent couple fights
- Troubled with sex related problems and troubles
- Individuals with personal and private secret

You will be surprised to know that there are so many who are in these categories. Fortunate and brave are those who come to the sessions for counseling as they will be provided with support to ease these disturbing mind and feelings.

The problems they are faced with are

- psychological hurt from psychological oppression
- loss of self-esteem and confidence
- high dependency and tendency towards loneliness
- Regret of one’s life and sense of unhappiness
- Uncertainty and conflict about future

1. It is necessary to speak out and find the solution to the fundamental problem. This will enable the hurt to be treated simultaneously gaining support and comfort by sharing. However, it is very dangerous to get support and comfort alone as it might generate other problems.

2. Self-esteem and confidence together with making the happiness of one’s own have to be sought through calmness and comfort of mind, it will be possible to make a reasonable choice with a cool-head and eventually design a happy life of the client.

For this to be possible, stability of mind is very important. Therefore the first step in the affair counselling is to ease the oppressed mind and feelings and gain the stability of mind. This will enable the rage and the psychological hurt to be treated. In other words, the stability of mind of the cheated is the core and essential factor in a solution to affair problem.

However, it is not easy for the cheated to stabilize the mind as the rage and hurt all together arouse with the event of affair. This is where understanding the mechanism of BonNeung or instinct comes in. This will let the hurt to stop and stabilize the mind. Those who have suffer for a long time would know that the simple psychology treatment is limited as most of the counselors or therapists do not understand the level of affair problem. It has a league of its own.

The starting point of the affair solution is the stability of mind (of the cheated)