When You Rage from Affair

The first thing that the cheated experience is the rage. Spouses Affair is "Post Traumatic Stress" that brings severe psychological pain. The problem here is that the cheating party do not have any idea of this at all.

From my counselling experiences, most of the cheated gets tremendous hurt and pain from the rage and sense of betrayal. Even though so called the forgiveness is given, may be because of various circumstances, these hurts of mind do not disappear easily. It is easy to think that these pains will diminish as time goes by but in reality it just gets bigger and pain becomes larger.

In addition, when the rage is expressed, this will cause family matters and sadness and pain is spilled out. If the rage is not expressed, serious depression will come. In this respect, it is easy to treat a rage when it has been expressed rather than not expressed at all.

Then why The Rage from Affair?

"How could you do this to me"
"The more I think of it, I get more angry"
"Is this what I get from being dedicated and loyal"
"Is this prize of marriage?"
"Happiness I thought I had was all lie."
"I was mistreated and abused."

These are the common quotes from the cheated. As such, having rage form affair is so natural. There is no excuse as to extramarital affair. It is definitely a big mistake. The rage is bigger when the cheated was dedicated and sincere to the family, children and to the spouse. It is also bigger for those who went through difficulties and hardships in life. It is even bigger for those who had relied and trusted wholly to the cheating spouse.

Rage come as the psychologically suppressed couple problem which has been endured during the marriage period, has been exploded all at once by the affair event. The rage is not only from the affair itself. It involves all the other problems of the marriage. This is why psychological hurt is so much immense. This is why the rage and sense of betrayal still exist even after the affair problem is solved. Rage involves expressed psychological suppression and couple conflict problem.

This also explains why couples get divorced after there has been forgiveness. The rage and the sense of betrayal still exist. Suppressed psychology and couple happiness that one has not known before has exploded and it makes it impossible to solve the affair problem. Once again, the shock and hurt is as severe as "Post Traumatic Stress" which left untreated will turn into "Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)". If the cheated would understand how big this stress and trauma is, they would not do it again. If you are still having rage and sense of betrayal, you should do away with the expectation that you and your spouse can solve your problem without any help.

Rage from affair is not a simple matter to be treated. It involves every hurt and pain, trauma, couple conflict and problem, problem of sex and many others from the past. In fact, it cannot be solved by people in general. It is a difficult problem even for the experts of psychology or counselling field. Affair problem has to be solved with the help of the expert. It is that much serious.

So do bear this in mind. Rage and sense of betrayal CANNOT be solved by the efforts of oneself or of a couple. Rage from Affair should be the first thing to be dealt with. After the rage is treated, affair problem can be solved. Do not waste your time, effort and money by looking for misleading information or by trying yourselves alone while couple problem becomes worse. You need an expert in Affair Counselling to help you. It is the fastest and the best choice.