An Easy Way To Treat Rage From Affair

The rage from being cheated cannot be solved by a general psychological counselling or couple counseling. Relying on religion or any other religious rage treatment program has no long lasting effect in treatment of rage from affair. These general treatments seem to be effective but in fact, the rage still remain deep within and will provoke other problems afterwards. Thus rage from affair is far much complicated than any other rages that one can encounter in life.

A new method is required to treat rage from affair so that it can be cured once and for all. Happiness Research Inc. has developed the very unique principle of affair and it’s new method of treatment for anger and rage due to affair.

Are you severely angry and suffering from being cheated? You do not need to be raged any more.

Happiness Research Inc. will treat you that can erase the rage from affair for good. You may think that we are lying and that this cannot be true. Our clients could not believe that they were free from the rage from affair. They recommend those around them with the same problem to apply for a session because they have experienced the treatment themselves and find them to be amazing and unbelievable.

With this “Principle of Affair Psychology” rage was treated rather easily than before. Rage treatment is essential as it is the first step in dealing with an affair problem. Rage has to be treated no matter at what stage of the problem the client is in. Being already divorced or not is not a matter.

With the rage still remaining, one’s life will remain to be suffering. This new method  can give you a comfort but will not be able to solve the affair problem and bring a couple happiness or individual happiness.

Think About Yourself Before Blaming The Cheating

It is a shock of a life time when cheated but it is necessary to think calmly about yourself before blaming the cheating spouse. The act of cheating is the solely the misdeeds of the cheating.

However, one has to calm down to find out the key reason for the affair and find a practical solution. If you start blaming the cheating, this will bring about anger and rage which will make it impossible to remain calm. It is why the cheated has to think and sustain calmness to make a right judgement with a cool head which is for the benefit of the cheated alone.

In case of the couple problem, and that you had been sexless, having done nothing about this matter can be a cause of infidelity of the spouse. If there had been frequent fights, than it would be wise to think that the couple were lacking true understanding and care. An affair means that your partner has felt another more attractive and felt happy having sex. In such case, one would have to ask why one was not able to have a happy sex life together with the partner.

If you are ignorant about sex, than you need to learn about it and find a proper way to solve this problem. As such, when placed in trouble because of the affair problem, it is so very natural that the cheated is in anger, rage and despair. However, do take a time to consider what you have done to the cheating partner before. Yes, you have dedicated yourself in the relationship and tried your best.

May be it was done in a wrong way as you can see what happened. Take it a time and think about the relationship again. Blaming the cheating spouse, and expressing the feelings of the cheated rather than trying to understand the partner, will only bring a deeper and serious trouble and hurt for both the couple. This will only make the matters worse. Thinking calmly with objective eye about your past relationship and about yourself and the cheating partner, will give you a glimpse of what changes have to be made and will provide you a willingness to solve the problem.

Rage Has To Be Treated Before Feeling Happy & Comfortable

In the event of marital affair, the cheating tends to give reasons or deny the fact. The cheated in turn becomes even more suspicious and increases the sense of betrayal. This will bring continuous quarrels and fights between the couple and eventually both the couple will be psychologically hurt and exhausted.

When this severe situation is repeated, the couple will not be able to stand the situation and sometimes the cheating (not the cheated) demands divorce. Usually the couples try to solve their problems by themselves as they have thought that they could solve their problem without outside help. As a result all the efforts they have made prove to have brought more pains and hurts.

From the sessions, we have found in a lot of cases that the clients feel more raged as the cheating spouse give reasons and even blame the cheated for the cause of affair rather than repenting his or her faults. The cheating even goes as far as treating the cheated as paranoid. At this time, it has to be considered whether the counseling be done to both the couple but in fact, it is better that the wife alone sit for the counseling.

If, in this case, both the couple come for counsel, it looks as if the cheated might forgive the cheating spouse when he or she repents and asks for forgiveness. However, in reality this is not so and I have seen so many of these cases. The cheated in reality tend to rage even more and say that such thing as counseling is not necessary and that they need a divorce. It is a shocking reality, something that is commonly seen in an affair counselling. Therefore, it is necessary that the cheated should be treated before anything when the cheated is denying his or her misdeeds.

It is not too late that both the couple be treated after the rage of the cheated is treated. This will lead to a true new couple relation and a changed and happy couple life. In an affair problem, the raged wants to be relieved, feel psychologically comfortable or dream one’s own life. In such an effort to be away form anger, the cheated tends to choose a divorce, seek a revenge (counter-cheating) or to pursue a separate happy life. These actions or countermeasures look convenient at first sight and brings mistaken happiness. It should be noted that these are not true happiness or comfort. Soon, one will find that he or she is living a life that is not a proper life and is getting hurt even deeper. This is a result from not solving an affair problem that is totally different form a general couple problem. It should be stressed that the rage is treated regardless of getting a divorce or not.

If you really want to be relieved and be happy, you need to have your rage treated. It is extremely important. A stabilized mind, an ability to see the cheating spouse with an objective eye, setting a strong mind, establishment of pride and self-esteem and independence from the cheated, all these will lead to a true comfort and happiness.

There is a proper step in solving an affair problem. When this is not followed strictly, the matters will get worse.

It Is Important To Release Your Oppressed Mind & Feelings

After the affair of the spouse is revealed, the cheated gets troubled because of hard feelings and oppressed mind. This is very typical at the initial stage of the counseling. It is not easy to speak openly about the troubles and oppression and most of the times, it is kept by oneself. Sometimes the cheated feels ashamed and feel conscious of the other people around; relatives, neighbors and friends. The affair problem is kept within oneself.

The causes of oppression and trouble are from
- Extramarital affair of the spouse
- The hardships and the endurance experienced during the marriage
- Sex related problems and troubles
- Selflessness and helplessness
- Psychological rage
- and others

The typically those listed below are more prone to these feelings

- Repeated affair and cheating of the spouse
- Repeated abuse, violence and conflict
- Individual happiness is put aside in the place of the happiness and calmness of the family and the spouse.
- Individuals who thinks that endurance is the best policy in solving problems and troubles.
- Frequent couple fights
- Troubled with sex related problems and troubles
- Individuals with personal and private secret

You will be surprised to know that there are so many who are in these categories. Fortunate and brave are those who come to the sessions for counseling as they will be provided with support to ease these disturbing mind and feelings.

The problems they are faced with are

- psychological hurt from psychological oppression
- loss of self-esteem and confidence
- high dependency and tendency towards loneliness
- Regret of one’s life and sense of unhappiness
- Uncertainty and conflict about future

1. It is necessary to speak out and find the solution to the fundamental problem. This will enable the hurt to be treated simultaneously gaining support and comfort by sharing. However, it is very dangerous to get support and comfort alone as it might generate other problems.

2. Self-esteem and confidence together with making the happiness of one’s own have to be sought through calmness and comfort of mind, it will be possible to make a reasonable choice with a cool-head and eventually design a happy life of the client.

For this to be possible, stability of mind is very important. Therefore the first step in the affair counselling is to ease the oppressed mind and feelings and gain the stability of mind. This will enable the rage and the psychological hurt to be treated. In other words, the stability of mind of the cheated is the core and essential factor in a solution to affair problem.

However, it is not easy for the cheated to stabilize the mind as the rage and hurt all together arouse with the event of affair. This is where understanding the mechanism of BonNeung or instinct comes in. This will let the hurt to stop and stabilize the mind. Those who have suffer for a long time would know that the simple psychology treatment is limited as most of the counselors or therapists do not understand the level of affair problem. It has a league of its own.

The starting point of the affair solution is the stability of mind (of the cheated)

Rage Therapy should continue

When the affair of one's spouse is revealed, rage outbursts and endless fights and quarrels occur hurting each other continuously. In many cases, husbands and wives want to be away from such pains and give up improving the situation thinking that the rage and hurts cannot be cured. This will result in divorce or helplessness.

However, amongst these problems and troubles, those who have will to solve the affair problem comes to visit our offices. The terrible rage reduces and it is possible to look at the cheater in an objective way. Fights stopped and there will be far less hurts. Now the cheater and the cheated becomes calm and remains in some way more comfortable than before.

This rage treatment is only the first step in the whole process of solving an affair problem and is a very basic and a must which is not that difficult to solve. Through this process, the couple hope for couple happiness and design their future. The problem here is that there are many clients who choose to stop therapy as the rage is reduced, and it is very wrong and not right.

1. The clients are satisfied with what they have already achieved. When the rage is somewhat treated, severe fights and quarrels get reduced and the couple get more comfortable. It is at this moment that the affair problem seem less and not important and the couple tend to stay that way. However, this comfort does not prolong for a long time. Sudden rage and pain repeat themselves according to the amount and the situation of the rage. As the power to cope with hurts and pains is weakened and accordingly the pain starts to get larger.

2. With the rage treated, the couple tend to feel confident that they can solve the problems by themselves. They try many different ways to solve this problem. However, the solution to an affair problem should be designed in detail and has to be planned otherwise, the self-respect and self-confidence might be lost and the dependency will grow larger resulting more serious problem than before.

Then, why is this happening? It is because the couple think it is easy and possible to solve their own problem by themselves, as they have been treated with rage and as they expect to have happier couple life.

Clients think that affair solution is as easy as rage solution. They have thought that the affair problem has not been solved because of rage and now that the rage is treated, they find it probable that they can work out the affair problem. Thus, they stop coming to see the counselor.

Now the clients feel comfortable and they start to think the time, cost and other inconveniences. It reality, a lot of clients refrain from continuous counseling due to economic burdens. I say, that this is very serious and a big mistake. True, the cheated feels comfortable and the rage is lessened but the remains of rage, the hurts from affair, are left untreated and these provide reasons for recurrence of rage. At this time, the rage might not be big but the pain the cheating feels gets bigger and the situation will become serious.

Another mistake is that the clients think of affair problem as a mere couple reunion. Detailed plans and implementation which will bring changes in both the husband and wife is needed. Also encouragement, willingness and efforts are necessary.

The change means the changes in habits, behavior and speech. It is impossible to make any kinds of efforts when what to be changed and how to be changed are not clarified. Couples tend to be reacting unconsciously against each other, mistaking the intents of each other’s and the rage will spur. As a result, when the affair problem is not solved as they have hoped after the treatment of rage, the pain and the difficulties are so naturally in order.

During the course of rage treatment, the past couple relation has to be recovered and the new couple happiness has to be designed. Body and the mind of both the husband and wife have to be changed and the habits to realize couple happiness has to be settled.

Therefore, after the rage is treated, a true affair solution has to be advised and the changes have to be made systematically. This is the only way to achieve a stable happiness and a solution to affair problems for each couple. An affair problem can never be solved by the efforts of the couple alone. It will only bring more pains and troubles.

Once again, it should be reminded that the affair problem is far from general couple problems and it involves totally different psychological operation of human beings. This is why a help from an expert on affair solution is in order.

Those With Rage Should Not Meet Each Other

It is so natural that rage, hurt and pain occurs when one is cheated. Consolation and comfort of mind is required and these are gained when they are shared with someone of same experience. The affair is such a private matter that it cannot be shared easily.

However, when this matter is shared, nothing seems to be difficult to mention even the most secretive and private things like sex and so forth. In other words, everything can be told so as to be consoled. The problem here is that not every comfort and sympathy is good.

On the first look, such sharing seems to be comforting but the result in the end is deeper pain and severe rage. They do not go away. They still remain. This is because by speaking and listening to other rage and hurt, one's own rage and hurt are increasing together. Thus, even though the psychological comfort lasts only for a short period of time, the rage may seemed to have been treated. This makes those with hurts and rages get together and share their difficulties. The rage will go larger and the vicious cycle will continue. Thus sharing affair experiences may seem to help the healing process at first sight but it is only temporary and in the end these sharing will induce larger pain and rage. This cannot be any help in solving an affair problem.

There are so many who, by making a wrong decision after listening to others with similar hurts, are led to such unhappiness. Particularly, rages from affair differs in man and woman and they require totally different treatments. If these men and woman with rages of extramarital affair of their spouses, meet each other and share their stories, it will eventually bring other problems different from the initial affair problems.

One should never ever talk about one's affair problem (of the spouse) to a friend of different gender, no matter how close they might be. It is very likely that their relation will become an extramarital affair in turn. This is something not to be overlooked.

In conclusion, affair problem can be shared to be consoled but in fact, it will do more harm than good. Those with rage, should not meet each other. An affair problem needs to be discussed at a session with the help of an affair problem expert.

 

How Rage From Affair Is Treated

It is so natural that the rage from affair takes place. If no so, it can be interpreted as a state of psychological divorce. Without rage from affair, the couple is no different from being divorced.

Unfortunately, most of the rage from affair, which is such a grave matter as to break couple relation and even a family, is not treated. This will eventually bring harder and difficult couple relations and the happiness of life can be lost. One with untreated rage from affair will live all because of the children or because there is no alternative choice. One would even think that it is one's luck, a fate and give millions of reasons to justify the situation. Rage from affair will disturb normal daily lives, increase doubt and distrust, anger and quarrels.

The way that we treat rage is rather simple but it involves complicated psychological therapy. As an affair counselling experts, we do not aim the psychological treatment. Rather, we focus on realistic solution and apply my "Principle of Affair". Many of our clients who believed that their rage could not be treated, have seen their rages treated through affair counselling.

The main reason of rage from affair is the sense of betrayal. Rage from affair is equal to "Post Traumatic Stress" and the intensity is so big. Because one has relied on the spouse, and that because one has trusted the other, whole marriage turns to be a lie and the future happiness and love is taken away. Whole life seems meaningless.

These all brings sense of betrayal, one would want to deny the situation psychologically and deep within mixed feeling is formed. This is why there is attack on the cheating spouse, a doubt, a fight. Psychologically, the cheated wants to reassure the love through rage.

Thus, it is important to make the cheated to understand that it is not the spouse’s affair that brought betrayal but the instinct and the mistake of illusion. I am not covering for the affair itself. I always makes it sure that the cheating spouse is the only one responsible for the affair and it is definitely wrong.

By understanding that the affair is wrong but it is not the act of betrayal, rage from affair can be said to have treated 80%. For this to be possible, we have developed the "principle of affair" through which idea of husband and the mind of a wife can be understood.

The remaining 20% of rage is the hurt from affair. This is the portion that the cheating spouse has to treat for the cheated. It can be cured through mutual care and love. If the couple is already divorced, this 20% rage has to be treated only.

Therefore, following steps are done to treat rage and to develop couple happiness.

1. Understanding what the problem is with the affair.
2. Understanding why there is feeling of betrayal and the problem with it.
3. Attaining psychological calmness through rage treatment.
4. Psychological changes for couple reunion and happiness.
5. Hurt from affair treatment in couple happiness.

Once the rage from affair is treated, one can discuss the faults and responsibilities of the affair. Only then, the coupe can develop a new relationship with renewed body and mind. With this method, we have treated over 90% of the couples successfully.

They said they are enjoying even happier lives than in their honeymoon period, after having been treated. Rage from affair has to be treated. Without this, any other solution to affair is useless. If one is divorced but the rage is not treated, it would be impossible for her/him to lead a happy life. Rage is a severe hurt. This is the reason why regardless of being still in marriage or not, the rage from affair has to be treated. Otherwise one will be unhappy whatever the life can be.

Why Is Rage Treatment Important?

Rage is the very first thing that the cheated spouse goes through when the affair of the other spouse is disclosed. The rage is from the deep sense of betrayal and hurt and it affects psychologically more than anger.

Rage treatment is the priority in dealing an affair problem. When rage is treated, following solution is rather easy. However, when the rage from affair is left untreated it will go on till the end of one's life. Rage should be treated so that the cheated can gain calmness and strength to solve the affair problem.

Rage from affair is "Post Traumatic Stress" and is expressed outwardly or reserved within oneself depending on the personality. In any case, the rage is sever and extremely painful.

Usually, couple crisis occur because of rage that lasts from several months to years. No matter how long the rage has lasted, it has to be treated and once treated, it provides a key in solving affair problem. Rage treatment is that much important. However, the period of the affair solution will depend on how long and how much the rage has been.

How the rage is expressed differs. Some will attack the spouse in quarrel and fight, some might blame oneself and feel depressed or helpless, or others might give up and live separate lives or has whatever attitude. All this is a starting point of divorce or separation. Rage do not disappear even after several years and it will be such a conflicting and hard time. General psychological treatment or couple counselling do not treat rage completely. This is what really happens even now at this moment.

Rage from affair is both a couple problem and "Post Traumatic Stress." As such, it cannot be dealt in general psychology centers or in a couple counseling. Such general rage treatments as crying out, singing, roll play or even cursing do not give nothing but a temporary effect. In reality these methods do not provide treatment for rage from affair. For the treatment of rage from affair, understanding of the cheating spouse has to be made. Understanding why the cheated feels raged and looking back at oneself has to be done. In other words, rage from affair is not a psychological or mental problem. It is something in between, something complex and real.

Through "Principle of Affair" that we have developed after counseling thousands of couples over the last decade, we have found by explaining and making the rage understood helped the rage from affair treated. Rage from Affair that has lasted over several years were treated through psychological calmness and stability process. Those who treated could not believe that they do not rage any more. This was all possible because of the "Principle of Affair".

We dare say that the Rage from Affair can be treated rather easily. There are clients who think that this is impossible and unbelievable. However, there are so many who has experienced this and in reality most of cases were successful.  

One has to have a peace of mind before solving the affair problem or before deciding divorce. This will allow the raged to lead a normal daily life and also will provide the base in solving the problem. With the rage treated, one can make clearer decision, be it divorce or not.

Rage treatment is priority before making any decisions otherwise you might be still suffering whatever life you choose to have. Everyone deserves to be free from rage and be happy.

When You Rage from Affair

The first thing that the cheated experience is the rage. Spouses Affair is "Post Traumatic Stress" that brings severe psychological pain. The problem here is that the cheating party do not have any idea of this at all.

From my counselling experiences, most of the cheated gets tremendous hurt and pain from the rage and sense of betrayal. Even though so called the forgiveness is given, may be because of various circumstances, these hurts of mind do not disappear easily. It is easy to think that these pains will diminish as time goes by but in reality it just gets bigger and pain becomes larger.

In addition, when the rage is expressed, this will cause family matters and sadness and pain is spilled out. If the rage is not expressed, serious depression will come. In this respect, it is easy to treat a rage when it has been expressed rather than not expressed at all.

Then why The Rage from Affair?

"How could you do this to me"
"The more I think of it, I get more angry"
"Is this what I get from being dedicated and loyal"
"Is this prize of marriage?"
"Happiness I thought I had was all lie."
"I was mistreated and abused."

These are the common quotes from the cheated. As such, having rage form affair is so natural. There is no excuse as to extramarital affair. It is definitely a big mistake. The rage is bigger when the cheated was dedicated and sincere to the family, children and to the spouse. It is also bigger for those who went through difficulties and hardships in life. It is even bigger for those who had relied and trusted wholly to the cheating spouse.

Rage come as the psychologically suppressed couple problem which has been endured during the marriage period, has been exploded all at once by the affair event. The rage is not only from the affair itself. It involves all the other problems of the marriage. This is why psychological hurt is so much immense. This is why the rage and sense of betrayal still exist even after the affair problem is solved. Rage involves expressed psychological suppression and couple conflict problem.

This also explains why couples get divorced after there has been forgiveness. The rage and the sense of betrayal still exist. Suppressed psychology and couple happiness that one has not known before has exploded and it makes it impossible to solve the affair problem. Once again, the shock and hurt is as severe as "Post Traumatic Stress" which left untreated will turn into "Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)". If the cheated would understand how big this stress and trauma is, they would not do it again. If you are still having rage and sense of betrayal, you should do away with the expectation that you and your spouse can solve your problem without any help.

Rage from affair is not a simple matter to be treated. It involves every hurt and pain, trauma, couple conflict and problem, problem of sex and many others from the past. In fact, it cannot be solved by people in general. It is a difficult problem even for the experts of psychology or counselling field. Affair problem has to be solved with the help of the expert. It is that much serious.

So do bear this in mind. Rage and sense of betrayal CANNOT be solved by the efforts of oneself or of a couple. Rage from Affair should be the first thing to be dealt with. After the rage is treated, affair problem can be solved. Do not waste your time, effort and money by looking for misleading information or by trying yourselves alone while couple problem becomes worse. You need an expert in Affair Counselling to help you. It is the fastest and the best choice.

 

Rage and Anger - The Difference

Through numerous sessions over the years, we have found that most of my clients do not differentiate rage from anger. Obviously they look quite the same, but they are clearly different.

When you show your anger, you attack the anger provider and your feelings of pain is relieved somewhat. Rage on the other hand, attacks the other but in turn you are attacked too. The bigger the rage, your hurt and pain grows within you.

Hwa-Byung (depressed and unexpressed anger usually shown typically in oriental society) induces severe depression and other mental diseases. Anger results from one's own pressed or depressed feelings whereas rage results from others and results in sense of abuse and psychological hurt. Thus rage only hurts the cheated more by attacking the faults of the other.

When you find your spouse cheating on you, you might achieve the goal of making your spouse hurt and burdened by blaming his/her faults and expressing your pain and betrayal.

However, rage also attacks your mind and your hurt and pain will become larger. In affair counseling, it is most important that psychological rage be treated rather than emotional anger. Rage is the very first step to be treated so that a client can control, ease or eliminate rage. Only after that, a client will find psychological stability, the problem will no longer get worse and proper solution can be ready. When extramarital affair is dealt with rage still going on, it will cause deeper and wider hurt and tremendous pain will occur. Unfortunately this phenomenon is found in many other psychological counseling where new rage occurs during the series of psychological treatment. Often, one rage might be treated but still another will come up.

Rage from affair MUST be immediately removed. One might argue how this can be possible. However, as an infidelity counseling specialist and from the experiences we have, rage treatment is the easiest process in an affair solution. This is why we sincerely recommend those in rage be at least be treated with rage solution. It will relieve your mind and comfort you and you will then be ready to move on.